Compassion Fatigue Solutions

Happy New Year to you all and greetings to new readers!

There is a lot coming up in 2008 and here's a sampling, in no particular order:

-For those of you who live near Kingston, there are still spots available to attend Dr Greenberg's January 25th workshop "Letting Go of Anger and Hurt". Visit website: www.compassionfatigue.ca to learn more.

-In the coming months, I will be interviewing wellness professionals of various types on this blog. We will be speaking with a health and nutrition specialist, a life coach and several other experts in their field. Stay tuned for these monthly posts.

-I will be reviewing new books in the field and interviewing their authors for the blog as well. Please email me if you have a favourite author/book you would like to see featured. I will try my best to get in touch with them and getting an interview.

Here's my post this week:

What is the picture above about? Well, it's my 7 year old completing the 1000 piece puzzle that he and I did (with some help from visitors) during our 2 week xmas holiday. Why is this worthy of mention? It's worthy of mention because it was a deliberate, mindful process to do a puzzle. Let me explain.

Like many of you, I'm sure, I tend to be a fairly driven, A-type person in many areas of my life. Now, I feel that I have made great progress in setting limits, improving self care, exercising regularly etc. but one thing that is a constant challenge is to sit down and not be doing chores all the time. When I'm at home this involves laundry, lunches, cleaning out the fridge, battling the basement mess, the list is endless. At the cottage, I could be chasing mice, sorting through the battered, broken handled pots and pans someone "donated" (ie dumped) to us while we were away. (This happens quite a bit. Friends and family who borrow the cottage enjoy giving us their used treasures -could be useful at the cottage! - actually this is a little message to any of them: please do not donate any more aluminum pots and pans, fondue pots in the shape of a bunch of bananas (we have one of those already), fiesta ware pottery, lead is bad for us just like anyone else and bright orange bedsheets from the 70s. We do NOT need any more of any of these things!)

But I digress...Let me return to the puzzle.

When I pulled out the puzzle at the cottage, my dad, who was visiting us for a few days, said "Wow, 1000 pieces. You are patient! Are you going to have time to finish it in two weeks?" and I replied "Don't know. Don't care really, I just enjoy the process of finding a piece that fits. It's so rewarding." Quizzical look on his face. He walks away, only to ask me, every single morning when he got up "So! Finished the puzzle already?" Laughter. It was cute on day 1 and 2, a bit annoying on days 3 and 4...

Anyhow, I did exactly what I told him, I got up each day, made some coffee and sat down to look for a piece that fit. I did this every day for two weeks. I didn't read edifying psychology books, I didn't read cookbooks, women's magazines, trashy magazines or anything else. I listened to Jack Johnson and Ben Harper on my cd player and worked on my puzzle.

A few days before the end of the holidays, several guests started getting worried that the puzzle wouldn't be finished in time. I really didn't care. But, people being people, it got finished by a team, including my seven year old who had the privilege of popping in the final piece (hence the photo).

So there you go. A rather lengthy explanation of a very mindful process. Not all of you will agree that doing a puzzle is a mindful thing, but I would like to suggest that there are many ways to fit in a mindful ritual/process in your daily life.

One of my favourite self-help books is by Patrick Fanning, entitled "50 best ways to simplify your life: Proven techniques for achieving lasting balance." It contains 50 very creative (and a few rather bold) strategies. The book is simply written - 2 pages per solution and easy to read. The one I enjoyed reading about this week was the following: It suggested picking a daily activity that you already do (his example was brewing coffee in the morning) and using that time to practice a mindful activity. How long does coffee take to brew? 4, 5 minutes? Fanning suggested taking that time to sit on a cushion and meditate.

Patti, a relative of mine, said that she had a similar thought after reading the wonderful book Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. She decided that her mindfulness ritual would be the following: whenever she was stuck in a traffic jam, she would tell herself "Ahead of the traffic jam is a miscommunication. When the miscommunication is resolved, we will start moving again. Until then, I need to breathe and focus on something within me."

What do you think? Do you have a mindfulness ritual of some kind? Could you practice a three minute meditation while lining up for groceries?

I hope you have a lovely week.